Torn between loving and letting go
Torn between loving and letting go
While love is celebrated by all as being something sweet and romantic, it can also be painful and heart-breaking - especially when one is torn between the decision of loving and letting go.
"Away from her" is the lyrical screenplay adaptation of celebrated author Alice Munro’s short story “The Bear Came Over the Mountain”. Away From Her is a beautifully moving love story that deals with memory and the circuitous, unnamable paths of a long marriage.
Married for 50 years, Grant (Gordon Pinsent) and Fiona’s (Julie Christie) commitment to each other appears unwavering, and their everyday life is full of tenderness and humour. This serenity is broken only by the occasional, carefully restrained reference to the past, giving a sense that this marriage may not always have been such a fairy tale. This tendency of Fiona’s to make such references, along with her increasingly evident memory loss, creates a tension that is usually brushed off casually by both of them. As the lapses become more obvious and dramatic, it is no longer possible for either of them to ignore the fact that Fiona is suffering from Alzheimer’s disease.
Eventually, Fiona decides that it is time for her to enter into Meadowlake, a retirement home that specializes in the disease. One of the more archaic rules of Meadowlake is that a patient may not have any visitors during their first month in the facility in order to “adjust.” After an excruciatingly painful 30 days separated from his wife, Grant returns to Meadowlake to discover Fiona seems to have no memory of him and has turned all of her affection to Aubrey (Michael Murphy), another resident in the home.
Grant, finding no option but to accept his new status as an attentive acquaintance visits her daily and is forced to bear witness to the cement bond that has developed between her and Aubrey. Over time, he befriends Kristy (Kristen Thomson), a salt of the earth nurse who works at Meadowlake. Touched by his dogged devotion, she takes a special interest in him. Through their conversations, Grant’s imperfect history and the perverse poetic justice of this agonizing situation with Fiona and Aubrey becomes evident.
When Aubrey’s wife, Marian (Olympia Dukakis) returns from her vacation, she suddenly takes Aubrey out of Meadowlake. Fiona is devastated by the separation and enters into a deep depression. Her condition deteriorates rapidly. Grant, fearful for Fiona’s life, embarks on the greatest act of self-sacrifice of his life as a means to attaining his wife’s final happiness.
Extracted from http://www.caprifilms.com/awayfromher/story.php
I found time amidst the busyness of readings and assignments to watch this movie with a friend. It's definitely not an action thriller but one does not feel that it's so slow moving either. Throughout the entire show, every scene just tugs at your heart and move you to feel the pain exhibited by the couple as they agonized over the harsh reality and the distance caused by Alzheimer disease. I empathized with the man who had to watch his wife transfer her affections to another man, and who could not even recognize him as her husband of 44 days as the days go by. It was painful for him - to hold on and trying to agree with what she said, "my, you're persistent, aren't you ..." or to let go and allow her to find her new found love that clings attachment to another man in the nursing home.
A love that far surpasses human love is the love God has for everyone of us. God will always hold on to love us, no matter what. Yet despite of His patience and love, we sometimes choose to turn our backs to Him. In His love for us, God will always cling on, no matter how painful, how heartbreaking, or how difficult loving us may mean; but sometimes He has to let go, against His will, because we are the ones who first chose that decision and He loved us too dearly to want to respect that choice.
While love is celebrated by all as being something sweet and romantic, it can also be painful and heart-breaking - especially when one is torn between the decision of loving and letting go.
"Away from her" is the lyrical screenplay adaptation of celebrated author Alice Munro’s short story “The Bear Came Over the Mountain”. Away From Her is a beautifully moving love story that deals with memory and the circuitous, unnamable paths of a long marriage.
Married for 50 years, Grant (Gordon Pinsent) and Fiona’s (Julie Christie) commitment to each other appears unwavering, and their everyday life is full of tenderness and humour. This serenity is broken only by the occasional, carefully restrained reference to the past, giving a sense that this marriage may not always have been such a fairy tale. This tendency of Fiona’s to make such references, along with her increasingly evident memory loss, creates a tension that is usually brushed off casually by both of them. As the lapses become more obvious and dramatic, it is no longer possible for either of them to ignore the fact that Fiona is suffering from Alzheimer’s disease.
Eventually, Fiona decides that it is time for her to enter into Meadowlake, a retirement home that specializes in the disease. One of the more archaic rules of Meadowlake is that a patient may not have any visitors during their first month in the facility in order to “adjust.” After an excruciatingly painful 30 days separated from his wife, Grant returns to Meadowlake to discover Fiona seems to have no memory of him and has turned all of her affection to Aubrey (Michael Murphy), another resident in the home.
Grant, finding no option but to accept his new status as an attentive acquaintance visits her daily and is forced to bear witness to the cement bond that has developed between her and Aubrey. Over time, he befriends Kristy (Kristen Thomson), a salt of the earth nurse who works at Meadowlake. Touched by his dogged devotion, she takes a special interest in him. Through their conversations, Grant’s imperfect history and the perverse poetic justice of this agonizing situation with Fiona and Aubrey becomes evident.
When Aubrey’s wife, Marian (Olympia Dukakis) returns from her vacation, she suddenly takes Aubrey out of Meadowlake. Fiona is devastated by the separation and enters into a deep depression. Her condition deteriorates rapidly. Grant, fearful for Fiona’s life, embarks on the greatest act of self-sacrifice of his life as a means to attaining his wife’s final happiness.
Extracted from http://www.caprifilms.com/awayfromher/story.php
I found time amidst the busyness of readings and assignments to watch this movie with a friend. It's definitely not an action thriller but one does not feel that it's so slow moving either. Throughout the entire show, every scene just tugs at your heart and move you to feel the pain exhibited by the couple as they agonized over the harsh reality and the distance caused by Alzheimer disease. I empathized with the man who had to watch his wife transfer her affections to another man, and who could not even recognize him as her husband of 44 days as the days go by. It was painful for him - to hold on and trying to agree with what she said, "my, you're persistent, aren't you ..." or to let go and allow her to find her new found love that clings attachment to another man in the nursing home.
A love that far surpasses human love is the love God has for everyone of us. God will always hold on to love us, no matter what. Yet despite of His patience and love, we sometimes choose to turn our backs to Him. In His love for us, God will always cling on, no matter how painful, how heartbreaking, or how difficult loving us may mean; but sometimes He has to let go, against His will, because we are the ones who first chose that decision and He loved us too dearly to want to respect that choice.
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